Wednesday, October 30, 2013

I Was Him and Me


But the spirit told\showed me that i don't have one relationship to one person, place, thing concept, fragment that isn't problematic. Every one is infused with shame so effectively that it's taken years to bring them to within their peak potential for mutual helping to speed up the process.

You are undergoing a process of purification, of first your relationship with yourself and ultimately with everything. You chose this. It wasn't magic. You knew you could not make anyone happy if you weren't essentially happy, at peace. And unconsciously you knew that until you addressed this, the idea of really engaging a woman would be repugnant.

All of it's been because you enjoined the aid of your spirit guide Jesus Naga-Luz. At the age of 13, the day you declared your devotion. From then forward, you've belonged to the lord in your heart, the only place he insisted on living comfortably, because he knew that was what you wanted. This cold fact rested in the recesses of your psyche until you were ready to know deeply what it does and does not mean. But it was you, big Glenn, with little Glenn as your test, that made and enacted the decision to be a faithful son, again and again. Even through the trauma of your early spiritual life (whose pain, to be fair, contributes to the spiritual insight you're so taken with) couldn't keep you from finding a way to work it out.

Earlier, as i drove to this reggae spot by the river, the spirit challenged me to assume the vision of the shaman, and get on with it. Right after that message, i saw/felt myself pass through a faint membrane, on the other side of which i felt myself bigger, steadier, alert wise and compassionate. I was him, and me.