She Dances with You (The Goddess Rest, Too)

12-3-13

You had to reach a certain amount of experience, and a certain amount of that deliberately present, awake. There is yet a ways to go, but you are assuming the tools to beautify your own life, including the correct orientation to the Earth Goddess in you, whom you call the Green One, The SnakeWoman, Wadjet, Co-being with Jesus Naga-Luz and the Goddess Rest. 

Her preference is to interact with you at the level of the exquisite emotion at the border of the soul dimension. She dances with you. The closer you come to the core, the closer you come to Naga-Luz, the closer you come to her.

The green one does not change. Things change about her. She is the definition of green, and all other colors in heaven and earth. Context, Protector, Firm but Gentle Teacher, Motivator and Fortifier, Pure humility, Boundless joy, Solid-Ness Underfoot, Density of I AM.

You don't have to doubt your feelings regarding any idea that you don't want to express or think should be communicated. That's why you're sensitive. You decide. There will be no coercion in this process. You be the expert on such things, in your life- Of course, only where you think it's the best way to be of service, including to yourself. Through practice, you are going to learn about yourself, and teach yourself to sink to the bottom, to reach the core.

Now, explore the sacred, quiet caverns of your mind. Say this in your meditation, "My soul rests, My soul is at rest. Rest inhabits my soul. My soul is Rest..."

Naming it-Those feelings in your gut, that are emerging as a result of this work, are guilt, fear of appearing disloyal (to an illusion), shame of not being better than all of it, and the desperate frustration of missing out on the greatest show in the universe of universes. It is one of the first and best indicators that you are looking more closely at the workings of your mind. Those emotions are an apparatus erected by you to protect your ego and pain body. You've suffered enough from this combination. We will address it and move forward.

The Goddess Rest Won

12-3-13

The first thing he said to me was that Rest was the one thing I deny myself as a matter of course, almost constantly, even in sleep. Rest must be chosen, and taken. You're running around looking for the ability to Rest, even if you can't find the worthiness in you, both of which you doubt possible. 

Doubt, also known as Crisis of Commitment. A common acquaintance to those raised to expect the worst, and/or those who didn't have time to grow secure before shelter disappeared. Fortunately, you have other acquaintances.

Yeah, Doubt, she reminds you of Rest. She tries to imitate that goddess, the ground of regeneration and rebirth. The impostor only gets as close in appearance (and that at a glance) as offering something better than you have now. But she is really an empty promise of Rest, who you're convinced must be in the direction the deceiver bids you turn. If you get that new love or thing (achieve worthiness), the lie goes, you'll be able to Rest. You'll finally see she really delivers what that brief flash in the corner of your eye had promised. You fall for it every time.

Her hair is ever greener grass. Her skin is any color you think you  want this instant, but absolutely what you don't have now. You think the eyes are your mother's, until you look directly into them. They're yours. You can tell by the agony in the corners. But it's an illusion. 

Do you see how sorry a substitute for Rest is this mother of unrealized life  lessons? Maybe you recognize her as the active ego. And she keeps you very busy. She's always around. In fact, she's the only one who will ever be, until you're ready to give her up. But she's an illusion, as dead as the infant whose corpse she holds in the bathtub in that dream (which was a sign used by your unconscious to help you see that life is being limited by your distance from Rest).

And when you look back on the opportunities of which you believe doubt has robbed you, you'll recall that, in the moment, the promise of something better wasn't even that credible or well defined in the first place. In your youth and situation, a faint suggestion was all it took to send you ripping away from now, in the direction she pointed, toward that which which failed again to deliver Rest. 

Thank God that's not the end of the story...